When you see the first feeding cues (rooting, restlessness, stretching) start feeding your baby immediately. Remember that crying is a late sign of hunger, and latch on may be harder once baby’s really hungry and crying.

Nipples come in all different sizes and shapes. Don’t compare your nipples to the shape or length of imitation nipples. When baby latches on and sucks properly, the differences aren’t usually significant. Keep in mind, baby should latch on to the areolar tissue, not just the nipple.

New mothers often hear, “Your baby can’t latch on because your nipples are flat”. If you follow the steps of an asymmetrical latch and it’s not working, chances are the problem has nothing to do with nipple shape. It’s more likely that baby is not using his tongue correctly to grasp the areola tissue. Another line you may hear is “You have great nipples and it looks like baby is latched on right”, but you’re experiencing nursing pain. If this happens and your nipple shape is different when it comes out of baby’s mouth, review these Do’s & Don’t’s and/or have a lactation consultant check your baby’s suck and latch-on technique.

However you choose to hold your baby for feeding, the rules for position, alignment and latch-on are the same as for the “cross cradle hold” below:

The “Cross Cradle” hold.
1. Sit on a couch or wide-armed chair with room for pillows and freedom for your arms. Glider rockers are great, but their narrow arms can be very restrictive in the beginning of breastfeeding.

2. If you’re comfortable removing unnecessary clothing, do it. Wear a nursing bra that, when opened, allows your breast to be fully exposed. Some mothers even remove their bras the first week.

3. Allow your breast to hang down naturally, and bring baby to it. Don’t handle your breast like a bottle, picking it up and moving it toward baby’s mouth.

4. Because babies, mothers and breasts come in different sizes and shapes, props will vary for each nursing couple. Pillows should support baby to the height of where your breast naturally sits. If you’re leaning over you probably need more pillows. If you have to raise your breast up to reach baby’s mouth, you need fewer. (Visit our Breastfeeding Shop for a selection of popular breastfeeding pillows for singles and twins).

5. Place baby on his side directly facing your body. Baby’s tummy should touch your tummy. (New mothers are often surprised at how close the baby should be.) Let his hips drop below your opposite breast. His hips should be flexed, his body curved around your body.

6. Aligning baby with where your breast and nipple naturally sit is paramount. When you look down, baby’s nose should be directly in front of your nipple.

7. Allow baby’s arms to rest in front of his body. If the alignment is right, arms and hands will be easier to manage. And keep your sense of humor about these little hands…your baby’s had a love affair with them in-utero and he naturally does what’s familiar. Try not to hold his hands and arms away from his body, hold them close in the direction of your body. He’ll soon get good at putting his hands in the right place.

8. Put your hand at the base of baby’s head, with your forearm running along her torso (not on the back of her head). Baby may tolerate having her head pushed on Days One and Two, but by Day Three--when you leave the hospital--she’ll become disgruntled and push back every time your tip her toward the breast.

9. Tickle the top lip and area under baby’s nose. Keep him close to your breast. When he rears his head back, bring him into the breast so his lower lip, chin and tongue touch the lower boundary of the areola first. Don’t let the top of his nose hit your breast first. When baby is aligned perfectly and presents onto the breast properly, it will almost look like the nipple isn’t going to go into his mouth. The nipple will be very close to the top lip. It may take several tries before baby stays latched on. As baby repeatedly comes off and on the breast, the areola softens and becomes more compressible for latch-on. Keep him busy coming off and on until he latches on. Don’t try to encourage latch-on by holding baby to your breast; he needs a running start and forcing will cause him to struggle and complain. Remember, too, that a baby’s cry is meant to communicate. You may wonder if he’s rejecting your breast, when he’s just saying “let’s do this a little differently”. When he latches on, if it feels better, it’s a better latch.

10. One last word of advice: if it takes several days before your baby latches on, remember to:
• Get expert advice on how to feed your baby until she starts latching on.
• Establish and maintain your milk supply (preferably using a medical-grade electric pump).
• Have some perspective, keep your sense of humor, and take it one feeding at a time.
• Don’t get ahead of yourself worrying unnecessarily.
• Kiss, smell, touch, stroke and memorize your baby. This is one of the sweetest pieces of your parenting adventure.